ON THE ROAD AGAIN

On March 5, 2019, Eileen and I (Russell) received a mission call to serve in the Philippines Antipolo Mission.  We are thrilled to be able to serve the Lord again as full-time missionaries.  We will be serving with President Mark Alder and his wife Beki.  Eileen will be working as the mission nurse and I will be working in the office.

For me this is an opportunity to return to the country where I served as a young missionary in the summer of 1975 while I waited for a visa to Indonesia.  Eileen has gone on three Operation Smile missions to the Philippines so she too has some familiarity with the country and its people.

Antipolo is approximately 12 miles east of downtown Manila.  The mission extends from Antipolo on the west to the coast (of Luzon) on the east, a distance of less than 100 miles.  While the distances are not far, we have learned that travel/driving times are long: 45 minutes from Manila to Antipolo (maybe 2+ hours in traffic) and almost three hours from Antipolo to the east coast. 

During the second week in June, Eileen attended training for medical missionaries in Salt Lake City while I attended training for office missionaries at the Provo Mission Training Center (MTC).  On Sunday, June 23, we spoke in church (our talks attached below), on Tuesday we were set-apart as missionaries by our stake president, and on Saturday morning we will board the plane.

We will miss our family members and friends during our absence but know this is what God wants us to do at this time in our lives.  We hope our missionary service will serve as a further testimony, in addition to our words, to our posterity of the importance of serving our Savior Jesus the Christ and spreading his message to the world.

At our setting apart with stake presidency
Left to Right (President Smith, President Robinson, Eileen, Russell, President Dushku

Eileen and Russell

Some of our grandchildren taken before the meeting, we didn't get a photo of everyone after the meeting.

Our mission farewell talks given on June 23rd, 2019

Russell's talk

Brothers and Sisters, we live in a wonderful day and age.  We can contact others instantly almost anywhere in the world through a variety of written, audio, or video platforms.  We can quickly search the internet for information on almost any subject.  We can shop for almost anything 24 hours a day from the comfort of our homes and have it delivered to our door.  We can view almost any show on demand on our own television or computer.  In many aspects of our lives we now expect almost instant gratification.  The desire by consumers for instant access to products has propelled the success of some of the world’s largest companies.  Waiting for anything is clearly something we as a people do not like to do.

Over 50 years ago, a Stanford University professor conducted an experiment on the willpower of preschool children.  What has become known as the “Marshmallow

Test,” tested children’s abilities to defer eating a marshmallow placed before them, for a period of 15 minutes, with the promise of a second one if they waited.  Only about a third could wait.  The professor then tracked those children over the succeeding decades.  The children who were able to wait tended to get better grades, make more money and have more successful relationships than those who could not.  From this experiment it appears that the ability to wait—to be patient—is a key character trait that might predict success in life.

In his General Conference address of April 2010, Elder Dieter F. Uchtdorf said, “Patience—the ability to put our desires on hold for a time—is a precious and rare virtue. We want what we want, and we want it now. Therefore, the very idea of patience may seem unpleasant and, at times, bitter.

“Nevertheless, without patience, we cannot please God; we cannot become perfect. Indeed, patience is a purifying process that refines understanding, deepens happiness, focuses action, and offers hope for peace.

“Impatience, on the other hand, is a symptom of selfishness. It is a trait of the self-absorbed. It arises from the all-too-prevalent condition called ‘center of the universe’ syndrome, which leads people to believe that the world revolves around them and that all others are just supporting cast in the grand theater of mortality in which only they have the starring role.

“As parents, we know how unwise it would be to indulge our children’s every desire. But children are not the only ones who spoil when showered with immediate gratification. Our Heavenly Father knows what good parents come to understand over time: if children are ever going to mature and reach their potential, they must learn to wait.”

During our lives each of us are required to wait for a variety of things depending upon our own set of circumstances.  I suspect that all of us have had the experience of waiting for an answer to sincere prayer for things which seem so right from our limited perspective.  For some of us it is waiting for a better job or for a worthy marriage partner. For others it may be relief from physical or emotional health challenges.  For many of us it may be in regard to wayward children or grandchildren.  The question is how long must we wait?

Brigham Young taught that when something happened that he could not fully comprehend, he would pray to the Lord, “Give me patience to wait until I can understand it for myself.” (Teachings of Presidents of the Church: Brigham Young (1997), 75)

Each of us must learn that in the Lord’s plan, our understanding comes “line upon line, precept upon precept”—on His time schedule. (D&C 98:12)  

Elder Uchtdorf tells us, “In short, knowledge and understanding come at the price of patience.  Often the deep valleys of our present will be understood only by looking back on them from the mountains of our future experience. Often we can’t see the Lord’s hand in our lives until long after trials have passed. Often the most difficult times of our lives are essential building blocks that form the foundation of our character and pave the way to future opportunity, understanding, and happiness.”

Forty-five years ago this coming November, I left home to serve a mission in Indonesia. It was a time of great excitement for me.  Getting a call to a far-off land, listening to the Prophet and Apostles in the Salt Lake City mission home, being an ordained servant of our Lord Jesus Christ, I was on a spiritual high and life was good.

Upon my arrival at the Language Training Mission (LTM) in Hawaii, where I was to spend the next eight weeks learning the language, I found that all was not well.  The prior group of Indonesian missionaries called 10 weeks earlier were still there.  I learned that they/we were having visa problems.  The severity of the problem became clear when all future incoming missionaries had their calls changed to Japan, after which no more were called to Indonesia.

Despite the many, many prayers offered to have us get our visas, nothing occurred and the group of missionaries prior to mine was moved into the Hawaii Mission.  The outlook was indeed grim.

It was in this tentative state, when one day while leaving the cafeteria, my companion and I ran into three of the Apostles on their way to lunch.  There I was face to face with Elders Hinkley, Monson, and Packer.  Elder Hinkley asked me where I had been called to serve.  I told him and mentioned that we were experiencing visa difficulties.  He replied that he was sure we would get to Indonesia.

I returned from lunch to my study and memorization of the discussion regarding modern day revelation.  As I pondered the phrase I was trying to memorize, that phrase being, “When the Apostles and Prophet speak with the spirit of the Holy Ghost, it is the same as if Christ himself were speaking,”  it hit me that I had just been told by an Apostle of the Lord Jesus Christ that he was sure I would get to Indonesia.

Months went by with no positive visa developments.  After spending over six months in the LTM, my companions and I were moved to the Hawaii mission.  Three weeks later I and one other were transferred to the Philippines Cebu Mission.  The missionary work was going very well in the Philippines and I had some great experiences there, but it was not where I had been told I would finish my mission.  Each day I would not only pray for a visa, I also would get up early and give one of the seven memorized discussions in Indonesian to the wall.  My companion and my zone leaders could not fully appreciate my belief that someday I would be moving on.

Words can not express the joy and relief I felt when the letter finally came telling me that my visa had been granted.  Eleven months into my mission I finally arrived in Jakarta.  At the time I felt that the first 11 months were just a test of my faith and endurance.  Over the succeeding years I have come to realize that those 11 months were: first, a preparation for the even harder remaining 13 months of my mission; and second, a time when two of the most spiritual experiences of my life occurred—experiences that would be the foundation of my testimony of Jesus as my Savior and modern-day Apostles being prophets, seers and revelators.   

When I was young, I felt that the 11 months I had been asked to wait for the answer to my prayer was a long time.  As I have aged I have come to realize that the answer to some prayers may not transpire until after a much longer period of time or perhaps even in this lifetime. 

In his talk Elder Uchtdorf explained an important point on how we should wait for our answers, he said “I learned that patience was far more than simply waiting for something to happen—patience required actively working toward worthwhile goals and not getting discouraged when results didn’t appear instantly or without effort.

“There is an important concept here: patience is not passive resignation, nor is it failing to act because of our fears. Patience means active waiting and enduring. It means staying with something and doing all that we can—working, hoping, and exercising faith; bearing hardship with fortitude, even when the desires of our hearts are delayed. Patience is not simply enduring; it is enduring well!”

Truthfully, I have always struggled with being patient.  What some may view as my being patient may in reality just be my being slow.  I also like to have my life organized, knowing what I will be doing for the foreseeable future; this, and striving to do what God would have me do are not always compatible.

While we were still serving in Germany, I really wanted to know what God would have me/us do following our mission.  My thought was that we would serve another mission.  However, I wasn’t hearing any answers to my prayers until we went to the temple two years ago.  At that time I got the feeling that I should wait and listen to my wife. During our exit interview in Germany, Elder Sabin told us in response to our questions about what we should be doing next, to “focus on serving the one.” 

Eileen and I have tried to focus for the last 21 months on her elderly parents, on members of our posterity and serving in the temple.  Although we have not been successful in all our endeavors, we have found great joy in seeing Bree taught by the missionaries and baptized, spending time with our family, and serving in the Bountiful Temple as ordinance workers.  If I were to die tomorrow, one of the highlights of my life would be my time serving in the temple—something I would have never anticipated just few years ago.

Although Eileen and I had continued to explore potential mission options, it wasn’t until January when we read of President Alder’s call as president of the Philippines Antipolo Mission that we knew that it was time for us to serve again.  I clearly remember sitting there and looking at the announcement and thinking, “I would have never guessed that I would be happy about the prospect of serving in a office position, located within the busy Manila metropolitan area, but I am.”  I am very grateful for a Father-in-Heaven who is patient with me.

God has a plan for each of us.  He wants us to be happy, not just in this life but more importantly for eternity.  The question for each of us is, will we seek, listen, and learn of His will for us and then do it.  This process is rarely one of immediate gratification or a path we can see clearly into the future.  It requires patience.

As Elder Uchtdorf has said, “Patience means to abide in faith, knowing that sometimes it is in the waiting rather than in the receiving that we grow the most.”  It is my hope that we will “continue in patience until [w]e are perfected.” (D&C 67:13). These things I say in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

Eileen's Talk

 A few weeks ago my father celebrated his 95th birthday.  Both my father and mother have suffered with poor health over the last few years.   My father’s health challenges are more of a physical nature, while my mother’s have been both physical and mental, suffering from Alzheimers and it’s associated effects. She has also had multiple falls in the last couple of months.  In a recent conversation they both expressed their desire to pass on soon, if possible at the same time, hand in hand. As my father said, he can’t wait to move from “This to Bliss” referring to moving from this life, on to the next life free from the challenges of mortality.  My parents have complete confidence in the Plan of Salvation and have great hope for what the future will bring. 

 In our pre-mortal existence, we attended a council with Heavenly Father’s other spirit children. At that council, our Heavenly Father presented  His great plan of happiness. We learned that a Savior would be needed to overcome the problems brought on by the conditions of mortal life. It was in this pre-mortal setting that Jesus voluntarily offered His life for all mankind. We must have had complete faith that he would perform his part of our Heavenly Father’s plan. Knowing that our return home was dependent upon being able to repent of our errors,  all of us chose to come to earth and experience this mortal experience. 

 As part of God’s plan we have been separated from God physically and spiritually.  Many aspects of life bring happiness, and some bring sorrow. 

 As a natural part of mortality we have the certainty of death, and the burden of sin.  We also have many other challenges as we struggle through mortality.  The Atonement of Jesus Christ can help offset these adversities and provide us the strength we need to overcome these mortal challenges.

 The purpose of the Atonement is to make it possible for us to return to God’s presence, become more like Him and have a fullness of joy.  Through the Atonement we can become cleansed from our sins, and also transform our lives, our way of thinking and acting, so that we may return to our heavenly home after this life. 

 If someone were to ask you what has been the most significant event in history, what would you say?  My immediate answer might include the discovery of electricity, indoor plumbing, the invention of the internet and the ability to travel to and communicate with others from every part of the world. All these things make my life easier, but they are all of transitory importance.  The Atonement of Jesus Christ gives purpose to every event in history. President Gordon B. Hinckley spoke of its relationship to other events in world history: "When all is said and done, when all of history is examined, when the deepest depths of the human mind have been explored, there is nothing so wonderful, so majestic, so tremendous as this act of grace.”

President Dallin Oaks discussed the Atonement in his  October 2015 conference talk:  (Quote) “Most scriptural accounts of the Atonement concern the Savior’s breaking the bands of death and suffering for our sins. In his sermon recorded in the Book of Mormon, Alma taught these fundamentals. But he also provided assurances that the Savior also experienced the pains and sicknesses and infirmities of His people.

“Alma described this part of the Savior’s Atonement: ‘And he shall go forth, suffering pains and afflictions and temptations of every kind; and this that the word might be fulfilled which saith he will take upon him the pains and the sicknesses of his people.’

“Think of it! In the Savior’s Atonement, He suffered ‘pains and afflictions and temptations of every kind..’  As President Boyd K. Packer explained: ‘He had no debt to pay. He had committed no wrong. Nevertheless, an accumulation of all of the guilt, the grief and sorrow, the pain and humiliation, all of the mental, emotional, and physical torments known to man—He experienced them all.’

“Our Savior experienced and suffered the fulness of all mortal challenges ‘according to the flesh’ so He could know ‘according to the flesh’ how to ‘succor his people according to their infirmities.’ He therefore knows our struggles, our heartaches, our temptations, and our suffering, for He willingly experienced them all as an essential part of His Atonement. And because of this, His Atonement empowers Him to succor us—to give us the strength to bear it all.

“Because of His Atonement, the Savior has the power to succor—to help—every mortal pain and affliction. Sometimes His power heals an infirmity, but the scriptures and our experiences teach that sometimes He succors or helps by giving us the strength or patience to endure our infirmities.

“What are these mortal pains and afflictions and infirmities that our Savior experienced and suffered?

“We all have pains and afflictions and infirmities at one time or another. Apart from what we experience because of our sins, mortality is filled with frequent struggles, heartaches, and suffering.

“Thus, our hymns contain this true assurance: ‘Earth has no sorrow that heav’n cannot cure.’ What cures us is our Savior and His Atonement.”

Because of His atoning experience in mortality, our Savior is able to comfort, heal, and strengthen all men and women everywhere, but He does so only for those who seek Him and ask for His help.  As Elder Neal A. Maxwell taught, “Having ‘descended below all things,’ He comprehends, perfectly and personally, the full range of human suffering.” We might even say that having descended beneath it all, He is perfectly positioned to lift us and give us the strength we need to endure our afflictions. We have only to ask.

Christ’s Atonement also provides us the opportunity to call upon Him who has experienced all of our infirmities to give us the strength to bear the burdens of mortality. He knows of our anguish, and He is there for us. Like the good Samaritan, when He finds us wounded at the wayside, He will bind up our wounds and care for us. The healing and strengthening power of Jesus Christ and His Atonement is for all of us who will ask. 

One day all of these mortal burdens will pass away and there will be no more pain. However in this life we can be strengthened through our trials if we will but ask. 

Recently my daughter Heather told me of a young girl in their neighborhood who had suffered from a cardiac arrest just hours after she celebrated her 14th birthday. She was hospitalized in the ICU up at Primary Children’s for several weeks and had subsequently suffered additional multiple cardiac arrests. My heart goes out to this family and the anguish they must be feeling.  I prayed regularly that they may receive  the comfort which comes through the Atonement of Jesus Christ.  

Many years ago I was 9 weeks pregnant when I was diagnosed with a large blood clot that threatened my life and that of my baby.  It was suggested to me that perhaps to save my life, I could have an abortion. This wasn’t an option in my mind. After a long and difficult pregnancy a beautiful little girl was born. Within hours she was transported to the ICU at Primary Children’s Hospital with severe respiratory problems.  After many days of traveling back and forth to the hospital to be with my daughter, I was physically and emotionally exhausted. One evening Russell asked me to say our nighttime couple’s prayer. I told him that I couldn’t. He plead with me not to turn my back on the Lord. Eventually I went to another room and privately poured out my heart to Heavenly Father. After some time I received an overwhelming feeling of love and a profound feeling of peace. I humbly returned to my husband’s side and told him of my answer to prayer. He asked me what I thought it meant. I didn’t know-I just knew that Heavenly Father loved me, was aware of my circumstances and that all would be well-regardless of the outcome.   I would be able to be with my daughter forever, no matter what happened, because of the Savior’s Atonement.  

I was so appreciate of this experience, as I knew and felt so strongly of the love of my Heavenly Father and my Savior towards me.

This past May at the BYU Women’s conference a panel was held with questions asked. One of the questions was from an overwhelmed mother of 4 young children, wondering how to find the strength to go on. Sister Cordon responded with this answer “I know I just have to go to my knees. And I ask the Lord, tell me again you love me, I need to know.”  She continued, “as soon as I feel that extra dose of love….I know I can do it.”

President Spencer W. Kimball told of Holman Hunt, the artist, who one day showed a friend his painting of Christ knocking at the door. “Suddenly the friend exclaimed, ‘There is one thing wrong about your picture. What is it? inquired the artist. The door on which Jesus knocks has no handle, replied his friend. “Ah, responded Mr. Hunt, that is not a mistake. You see, this is the door to the human heart. It can be opened only from the inside.”  President Kimball then continued: "And thus it is. Jesus may stand and knock, but each of us decides whether to open.”

Among its many blessings, the Atonement brings peace. In order to receive it’s consoling peace, we need to open our heart and be willing to accept it. 

Elder Tad Callister said,  “The Savior's plunge into humanity was not a toe-dipping experience. It was a total immersion. He did not experience some pains and not others. His life was not a random sampling, a spot audit; it was a total confrontation with and internalization of every human experience, every human plight, every human trial. Somehow his sponge alone would absorb the entire ocean of human affliction, weakness, and suffering. For this descent he would fully bare his human breast. There would be no godly powers exercised that would shield him from one scintilla of human pain.

“It would even include the suffering of those who chose not to repent. In other words, the Savior suffered not only for those whom he knew would repent, but even for those who would choose never to embrace his sacrificial offering. Brigham Young made this clear: ‘The Savior has paid the full debt, whether you receive the gift or not.’

When Christ died, He died for you individually just  as if you had been the only person  in the world.

Elder Callister continued, “No mortal can cry out, He does not understand my plight, for my trials are unique.  There is nothing outside the scope of the Savior's experience. As Elder Maxwell observed, As a result of his mortal experience, culminating in the Atonement, the Savior knows, understands, and feels every human condition, every human woe, and every human loss. He can comfort as no other. He can lift burdens as no other. He can listen as no other. There is no hurt he cannot soothe, rejection he cannot assuage, loneliness he cannot console. Whatever affliction the world casts at us, he has a remedy of superior healing power.

“The Savior is anxious that the Atonement make us better. He must be gravely disappointed if people merely acknowledge his Atonement as a magnificent sacrifice to be viewed in awe, but with no thought of change. The atoning sacrifice was designed to motivate us, to draw us unto him, to lift us to higher ground, and ultimately to assist us in becoming as he is.”

As I have been able to study and ponder about the Atonement of Jesus Christ over the last several weeks, I have come to more fully appreciate this sacred and sublime event in eternity. I am very grateful for the sacrifice that Jesus Christ made for me.  I have felt the healing effects of the Atonement many times in my life. I have been greatly blessed by my Heavenly Father. It is for this reason that we are serving another mission. Perhaps in a very small way I can show my love for Him through my service. 

I am grateful to be a member of this church. I am grateful for my family and my good companion who is patient with me despite my many imperfections. I am grateful for the many consecrated couples we have served with on our former missions. Many have served multiple missions. They are a great example to me. I look forward to serving with Russell and President and Sister Alder in the Philippines. 

I say these things In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

OUR LAST POSTING

Today we reported on our mission to the High Council and also in Sacrament meeting.  We were grateful to have family members, former missionary colleagues, and friends there.  Our talks are attached below.

Eileen's homecoming talk:

In July we celebrated our 39^th wedding anniversary. Russell reminded me that we have been serving as Full-Time missionaries for our last 6 anniversaries. It seems very strange to be  without my missionary tag. However,I am grateful to be back home in Utah spending time with family and friends.

Our missionary call was to be Europe Area Welfare Specialists.  In this role we were responsible for giving guidance and administrative support to the 15 humanitarian couples spread throughout the Europe Area. I consider these humanitarian missionaries my friends. We were concerned for and prayed for these couples on a daily basis.When we served in Indonesia in a humanitarian capacity, the Area Welfare Specialists came from Hong Kong to train us.  During our training with them,  Sister Meehan said to me “my goal is to help you stay on your mission.”  I thought what a silly thing to say, of course I will stay on my mission!  I soon realized why she would say this. Humanitarian couples are often placed in areas with poor living conditions, where a language other than English is spoken, and where there are usually few members of the Church.  It can often be very demanding and frustrating.  The wives  especially have a challenge with a sense of loneliness. Because of our past experiences I believe we were more sensitive to the needs of our couples.  There were many times when I felt prompted to call a couple only to discover they had experienced a particularly difficult day.  

I would like to share  some of the experiences we had on our mission related to promptings of the Holy Ghost. 

Elder Boyd K. Packer has said  “That sweet, quiet voice of inspiration comes more as a feeling than it does as a sound. Pure intelligence can be spoken into the mind. The Holy Ghost communicates with our spirits through the mind more than through the physical senses. This guidance comes as thoughts, as feelings, through promptings and impressions. We may feel the words of spiritual communication more than hear them and see with spiritual rather than with mortal eyes. “

There were many times during the 18 months of our service when we knew we desperately needed the guidance of the Holy Spirit to know how we should proceed. I am grateful for God’s answers to our many prayers for help.

One of the responsibilities of our calling was to train new humanitarian couples as they arrived in the mission field.  We would make sure their computer, phone, and printer were set up and working, discuss humanitarian principles, and teach them about both the financial and church humanitarian software needed to be successful in their callings.  Our first training was in a country where only  a handful of members other than the missionaries attended church. Our humanitarian couple filled all the Church leadership positions for this country.  Although the Olsons had previously served in Ghana, they could sense the heavy responsibilities which came with this calling. To make things a little more complicated, Sister Olson broke her arm on the first day in the MTC.  Her arm was operated on just two days before departing for Montenegro. 

After picking us up at the airport in Podgorica,  Elder Olson pulled out his wallet to pay for the parking.  Later that evening when we were going to get some dinner, he couldn’t find his wallet. Russell went with Elder Olson to the car assuming he had left it in the car. They were gone for a really long time and came back empty handed. We scoured the apartment looking for it.  We knew that if we didn’t find the wallet there would be some serious challenges.  It would be very difficult to lose all of your personal information while in the United States. It would be significantly worse to lose it in a foreign country where you can’t even speak the language.   We all knelt in prayer while Sister Olson offered a very heart-rending prayer, beseeching God for help in finding the wallet. We went back down to the car. With her good arm Sister Olson pulled back the seat of the car.  There was the wallet. The two Elders looked stunned. They had both looked under the seat without seeing anything. I am confident that we had an immediate answer to a sincere prayer.

On another occasion we were in Serbia working with the Swendsen couple.  We encountered several challenges during the training process. I was the one who had the responsibility of getting all of the electronic devices set up.  I worked on setting up the computers, while Russell and Elder Swendsen went to get the Swendsen's phone working.   It was  very hot and humid in Serbia with the temperature being over 104 degrees and having only marginal air conditioning. It took the Elders 3 separate walking trips  to the store before they were able to get the phone functional. The Swendsens also made trips to 3 different stores before finding an appropriate printer.  While the other missionaries were running these errands, I stayed in the apartment and worked on the computer. There were some major hurdles.  I spent numerous hours on the phone with the IT department in both Frankfurt and SLC. When I was finally told by the church IT employee in Frankfurt to turn off the computer and bring it back to Germany, we all looked at each other in dismay. At this point our first 48 hours, precious training time, had been spent working on the electronic devices. 

Every morning during training we would have a prayer with the local couple before starting the day.  On the third day Elder Swendsen offered a very sweet prayer asking for assistance in getting the technology issues resolved so we could move onto the other aspects of training.  After getting off the phone with Frankfurt, I was quite discouraged.  I didn’t know how we could do the training without a church issued computer. Elder Swendsen suggested to me that we try one more time with the Global Service Center at Church headquarters. I had already been on the phone with them multiple times. They had even used remote access to view the computer, however were unable to resolve the problems.  I took his suggestion and called one more time. Within an hour the computer was up and running. We all considered this a tender mercy and truly a miracle.

Elder Ronald Halverson said “Many of us get so involved in our day-to-day tasks and worldly pursuits that we do not notice the many small miracles that constantly occur around us.  We do not know the future, but our Father in Heaven does, and He will lead and guide us if we let Him.”

When we first arrived on our mission 18 months ago we were very busy and quite overwhelmed.  We determined that one way to receive the help we needed with our calling was to attend the temple regularly. We knew this would be difficult, if not impossible, unless we planned ahead.  We set a date in August when we would attend the temple in The Hague.  At the temple we were surprised to see Tom and Anita Herway.  Tom and been our bishop when we lived in Belgium 17 years ago. Anita had been our children’s seminary teacher. We knew them quite well, however we had only seen them once briefly in 16 years. 

We learned that Tom was retiring soon and they had come to the temple that day fasting and praying seeking guidance as to how they should proceed with their mission plans. Russell mentioned that our last mission had been in the Missionary Department working with senior missionary assignments and that we would be happy to help them understand the process if they had any questions. Anita told us that she felt that meeting us was in some way an answer to their prayers.  Midway through the sealing session I had the thought, Tom speaks Italian. I know that I did not remember this fact about Tom on my own, rather I believe it was revealed to me by the Holy Ghost. 

 I knew that we had just opened a new position in Italy for a couple to provide humanitarian aid to the refugees. While living in Belgium there were many refugees in our ward. Tom had worked with the refugees both as a bishop and also as a stake president in that area. We thought they might be well suited for this position. The Herways knew President Kearon (who was the Area President at that point in time). At Russell’s suggestion they sent a brief email to him mentioning that they would be submitting their mission papers soon, however not requesting any kind of specific mission.  Within just a couple of days President Kearon had determined that he would like to have the Herways serve in Italy assisting with the large influx of refugees. It has been humbling to watch Tom and Anita’s mission call come forth and see the great service they are performing in Italy associated with refugee aid.

There have been times  in my  life when I have recognized that events are not luck or just coincidence, but that there was a divine purpose in why I was  where I was at that exact moment. This was one of those times. 

President Monson has taught, “As we pursue the journey of life, let us learn the language of the Spirit.” The Spirit speaks words that we feel. These feelings are gentle, a nudge to act, to do something, to say something, to respond in a certain way.

 While in Frankfurt I was good friends with another senior sister. She had been widowed several years previously and was serving in Frankfurt without a companion.   Chris and I often went to the gym together, and she even joined Russell and I on two  temple excursions.  A few months ago Chris needed to return to the United States for a medical procedure. I offered to take her to the airport.  I knew that the outcome of this procedure was a concern to her. Before our departure for the airport, I asked if we could say a prayer together.  She asked me to offer the prayer.  As I was saying the prayer I asked the Lord to allow Chris to be aware of others she could share the gospel with. I was overcome with the spirit. As the prayer ended Chris looked up at me and said, “What just happened?”  I told her that I knew there was someone she was supposed to share the gospel with. She agreed and raced around her apartment looking for some missionary pamphlets. She asked me “should I bring German or English brochures?”  I suggested that she should bring English.  I dropped Chris off at the drop off area at the airport, then went to park the car.   Just as I climbed out of the car I received a text from Chris saying that she had already given away her brochures!  I went into the airport to meet her new friend.  Jose was from Mexico and had been on a business trip to Germany.  He saw her missionary badge and started asking her questions about the church and what we believe in.  Fortunately Chris had several missionary pamphlets in her carry on luggage and was able to share these with Jose. 

President Monson said “We must be confident in our first promptings. Sometimes we rationalize; we wonder if we are feeling a spiritual impression or if it is just our own thoughts. When we begin to second-guess, even third-guess, our feelings—and we all have—we are dismissing the Spirit; we are questioning divine counsel.”  I am glad we heeded the promptings I felt during our prayer together. 

One of the opportunities we had in our position was to report to a member of the Area Presidency. We reported to Elder Gary Sabin of the Seventy.  He and his wife are extraordinary people of whom we have the deepest respect.  Shortly after his assignment to the Europe Area we met in a Welfare meeting with Elder Sabin and others.  We had been asked by our manager to develop a presentation regarding the financial situation of each country in the Europe Area in which a humanitarian couple was serving. We made the presentation and then Elder Sabin asked us a question, “What is the greatest concern in your calling?  What keeps you up at night?”  This question was totally unexpected, however Russell and I both replied with the same answer.    It was our mutual concern over the isolation that most of our couples have to deal with in their assignments.  

The question Elder Sabin posed was certainly inspired, and I believe our spontaneous answers were also inspired. This started a dialogue which eventually resulted in a couple’s conference in Madrid, Spain.  Attending this conference were the humanitarian couples, our manager, and Elder and Sister Sabin.  It was heartwarming to see the couple's interact with each other and make new friendships. It reminded me of the Book of Mormon story in Alma 17:2 where Alma was reunited with his brethren after many years of serving as missionaries. The scripture states that "Alma did rejoice exceedingly to see his brethren".  It was such a blessing to have this privilege of being together. The couples discussed their challenges and successes. We attended a temple session together. For most of the couples, this would be the only time during their mission that they would be able to attend the temple. 

At the conference, Sister Sabin  related the story about Elizabeth McCune.  In 1868, Brigham Young closed a conference in Nephi, Utah by reading the names of a number of men, who were to take their families and relocate to settlements some three hundred miles south along the Muddy River.  When Elizabeth heard her father's name she began to weep.  Her friend said, "Why are you crying? My father has been called too, but you see that I am not crying because I know he won't go." Elizabeth looked directly at her friend and said, "That is just the difference.  I know that my father will go and that nothing will stop him."  As Sister Sabin was relating this story I thought of our couple missionaries.  Each one had heeded the call of a prophet to serve where they were called.  Each left the comforts of home and family to labor in locations and circumstances that are far less than ideal. In Elder Sabin’s comments he used the hymn "Let Us All Press On" as the basis for his remarks. As I thought about his comments and the words of the hymn, "Fear not, . . . Courage, for the Lord is on our side" and "the Lord alone we will obey," I realized I need to both be more obedient to God's direction and then have faith that all things will work out.  All too often I find myself fearing about or worrying over the everyday challenges of life when I should be more thankful to God for my many blessings and trusting in Him.  I do love the Lord and am grateful for the tender mercies in my life which he has blessed me with.

I would like to say a few words now about being away from our family. We have 14 grandchildren, 13 of which are here today. We missed our grandchildren and other family members very much.  I have served missions, because I know that is what Heavenly Father wanted me to do.  He has blessed us greatly, and I want to serve Him in any capacity that I can.  I know that this Church is true, and that we have a prophet living on the earth today, even President Thomas S. Monson.  I am grateful for the love which Heavenly Father has for all of his children. I am grateful for Jesus Chris, my older brother.  I know that through His atoning sacrifice we can repent of our sins and also find relief from both physical and emotional burdens that we are carrying.  This I know. I love Russell and am so grateful for his guidance as a husband, father, grandfather and missionary companion.  I am grateful for the eternal friendships I have made while in the  mission field. 

Eileen and 3 daughters 

Eileen and Sister Hawkins who served in Greece

Eileen and Russell

Russell's homecoming talk:

Our role during our recent mission as Area Welfare Specialists basically involved assisting Humanitarian missionary couples serving primarily in Central and Southeast Europe, and also in Cape Verde (off the west coast of Africa).  We didn’t initiate or implement the humanitarian projects or meet the beneficiaries.  We just taught, coached and supported those who did. 

As I look back on my missionary experience, I find the things that I will treasure the most are my relationships with three individuals or groups of individuals.  The first, is my relationship with the missionary couples with whom I served; primarily those that I served on a daily basis.  Second, is my relationship with my eternal companion.  Third and most important, is my relationship with God.  I would like to take a few minutes and talk about each of these three relationships.

Events during our first few days in Frankfurt let us know that we needed to quickly develop a relationship with each of the Humanitarian couples in our Area.  By the end of our first week we initiated long Skype calls with each couple, learning of their respective challenges and personalities.  During the next 17 months, our relationship with each new Humanitarian couple would start with a Skype call shortly after they received their mission call.  In each case we wanted the couples to know that we were a resource they could call upon at any time.

About a quarter of our time was spent going to visit the new couples shortly after they arrived in the field.  While this may sound exotic, it was to places like Tirana, Skopje, Chisinau, Cluj, Miskolc and Mindelo.  Not places you would find on someones destination list for a European vacation.  But they are great locations from which to serve to “poor and needy” of Europe.  

We helped the couples get their technology working, acquainted them with the Humanitarian computer program, trained them on keeping track and reporting of Humanitarian finances, and taught them about the different types of Humanitarian projects and their various requirements.  On our visits we also tried to introduce them to local NGOs (non-governmental not-for-profit charities) who might make good project partners.  Foremost, we tried to establish a friendship with each couple that would allow us to continue supporting them thereafter from Frankfurt.

As Eileen has mentioned, our couples were almost always serving in locations where isolation was a major concern.  Many times they just needed someone to talk to who had been through a similar mission experience that could listen.  I have grown to love those couples that I served; and I have found joy in seeing their success and happiness.

I would like to tell you briefly about two of these couples.  

The first couple were called to serve in Sicily with the refugees. The Elder had served in Italy when he was young and with his wife they had served a few years earlier in Ghana.  While in Ghana the Elder was kicked in the eye and had to be emergency evacuated out of the country in an effort to save his sight.  He has undergone several operations trying to keep the vision in his damaged eye.  

About two months before the couple were to enter the MTC, I received a call from the Elder.  He said his doctor was insisting that he have another operation and that the recovery time might cause his MTC date to be missed.  He was supposed to go and apply for his visa the next day.  The visa would only be good for a fixed period of time and if the operation recovery was prolonged he would miss both his MTC date and the valid period for the visa.  He was asking my advice if he should still apply for the visa the next day or wait until his post-operation recovery was better known.  Waiting until the recovery was known to apply for the visa would significantly delay their mission start date due to a number of other factors.

The phone call quickly became a very personal and spiritual conversation.  We discussed his feelings and those of his wife.  I could relate to his situation having entered the MTC just a year before still needing followup procedures resulting from recent kidney surgery.  They decided to move forward with faith, followed by daily prayers until they entered the MTC.  

When we met the couple for training in Sicily, we learned more about the event in Ghana which caused his eye problem and the subsequent operations.  We talked about the cost of serving missions.  We discussed the physical and emotional toll serving sometimes takes, which usually makes the financial cost pale by comparison.  It was gratifying to see the Elder speaking in Italian with the local people everywhere we went.  It was clear to me that he was serving where God wanted him to be.  A few months ago we got a letter from the Sister in which as she described their witnessing the disembarking of over a hundred refugees off a rescue ship and the efforts made to meet the refugees immediate needs.  Once again I was sure they were serving where God wanted them to be.

The second couple I would like to tell you about was called to serve in the northeastern part of Hungary, near the Slovak and Ukrainian borders.  When we first Skyped with the couple following their receiving their mission call, it was clear that Elder had already done research about some of the health challenges of the locals where they had been called to serve.  He had already formulated a plan in his mind on how to address one of those perceived needs and wanted to start working on it before even reaching the MTC.  What they did not want to do was continue the work that the prior humanitarian couple had devoted almost all their time to.  That project was a multi-year social rehabilitation and integration project for unemployed Roma.  To me the project looked a lot like a stake farm with a strong social counseling component.

Upon arrival the couple did work to complete the project started by their predecessors, perhaps reluctantly at first and then later more enthusiastically.  Part of the project involved teaching a class each week to a number of the local beneficiaries.  When we visited one of these classes with the prior couple there were perhaps a dozen people in attendance.  One day last summer I got a call from the Elder.  He said, we have a problem; we had about 50 people at the class last week.  I told him, it sounded like a good problem to have.  The Elder then explained that within the class there was a large extended family group and that they had asked if they could come to church.

Usually missionaries are excited when non-members want to come to church.  However, as Humanitarian missionaries we are instructed not to share the gospel with our project partners or beneficiaries.  This is drilled into the couples while they are in the MTC Humanitarian training.  The fear is that our humanitarian efforts will be seen by non-members as linked with the Church’s proselyting efforts, which it is not.

I advised the Elder to refer the inquiry to the director of the NGO partner.  The NGO director, Melinda, is an interesting person.  I have met her only once; she reminded me of a Peace Corps worker from the 1960’s who had just never gone back home.  I found her to be intelligent, tenacious and dedicated to her cause.  The Elder then told me that he already did that and that Melinda thought it would be be a great idea.  She thought going to church would help the Roma integrate into normal society.  At that point all we could do was refer those wanting to go to church to the mission president and young missionaries, and then try to keep the humanitarian work separate from any proselyting effort.  The real shocker came just a month before we left.  Melinda wanted to meet with the Humanitarian couple the next time they were in Budapest.  During their meeting Melinda told our couple that they and their predecessors had been a great example of christian service to her.  So much so, that she would like to learn about our Church and possibly join.

As of a week ago, Melinda was reading the Book of Mormon; she wants to finish it before starting formal lessons with the young missionaries.  It has been gratifying to me to watch this Humanitarian missionary couple come to feel that their service and sacrifice are worthwhile; perhaps just not in a manor they had ever expected.

When we entered the MTC for our third time, our instructor asked what we hoped to achieve during our time there.  My answer was to emerge with my wife having had a great experience and with her being happy with me as her companion.  Seeing my wife happy in her service as a missionary has been a top priority for me. Working with her as an equal partner in our calling has been a pleasure.  During the first year, most of my time was spent doing accounting work, which left Eileen as the primary person advising the couples on the humanitarian projects.  I was proud of her as I watched her guide the couples in doing better projects.  I will always treasure our early morning walks [in the graveyard] and our Saturday bike rides along the Nidda River together.  I have returned home with a better relationship with my spouse; for that I am very grateful and recognize I am truly blessed.

In 3 Nephi 27:13 Jesus tells us that, “I came into the world to do the will of my Father.”  And then in verse 21 he states, “and ye know the things that ye must do in my church; for the works which ye have seen me do that shall ye also do; for that which ye have seen me do even that shall ye do.“  

My primary goal during this mission has been to submit my will to that of my Father-in-Heaven; a goal that I have failed at again and again over the last year-and-a-half.  My time in Frankfurt has helped me see my weaknesses more clearly, my murmuring and trusting in my own understanding.  Yet in my failing I seem to have grown closer to my Father-in-Heaven and appreciate more the atonement my Savior Jesus Christ.  I find my motives in attempting to “do good” are less and less to achieve some future reward and more just a desire to try and please Him.

Two weeks ago in Stake Conference, President Strong spoke about living a consecrated life and submitting our will to God’s will.  He held up a card (this card) with the picture of the Bountiful Temple on it that the stake presidency had previously distributed to the members of our stake.  For most of my mission I had this card pinned to the wall just behind my desk phone so I saw it many times each day.  President Strong’s words reminded me of a scripture I thought about a lot in the mission field.  In Luke 9:24, our Savior taught, “For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: but whosoever will lose his life for my sake, the same shall save it.”

In applying this scripture to our humanitarian efforts, I remember President Monson’s comments on the verse.  He said, “I believe the Savior  is telling us that unless we lose ourselves in service to others, there is little purpose to our lives.  Those who live only for themselves eventually shrivel up and . . . lose their lives, while those who lose themselves in service to others grow and flourish - and in effect save their lives.” (Thomas S. Monson, What Have I Done for Someone Today? Ensign, Nov. 2009)

Giving up the “lives” we have made for ourselves (or in our arrogance believe we alone have made for ourselves), is difficult.  Many times it involves giving up family, career, property, titles, respect and other conveniences to which we have become accustomed; and then trusting God that He knows what is better for us than we do. In the Europe Area Office I witnessed a number of missionaries  who were striving to follow our Savor’s admonition.

One was a former CEO of a Fortune 500/top 20 company.  In his missionary role he was humbly taking daily direction from a far less experienced employee.  I worked with several retired lawyers utilizing their professional training doing work their para-legals and first-year legal staff would have been doing at home.  One had even taught in law school the employee to whom he now reported.  I witnessed an oncologist, who previously headed a cancer institute, field run-of-the-mill medical questions from missionaries and direct them, if appropriate, where they should go for help.  He could advise but not actually practice medicine.  Yet despite their loss of stature in the eyes of the world, I witnessed these Elders find joy in helping to build God’s kingdom here on earth.

Perhaps the most vivid example to me of one “losing his life” in serving God was our Missionary Department In-field Representative (IFR).  Each of the Church’s 13 geographic Areas has one of these individuals assigned to it; 11 are paid employees and 2 are full-time missionaries (including this one in Europe).  The Elder was formerly a successful businessman, mission president, and member of the Provo MTC presidency for several years.  In both the eyes of the world and the Church membership he had achieved a lot.  IFRs basically help mission presidents deal with difficult missionary issues such as moral, health or legal problems.  Due to the confidential nature of his work he couldn’t share with others the details of what he did each day, not even with his companion.  When I would see this Elder I would ask him, “Busy day?”  If he said yes, I would say I’m sorry.  If he said no, then I would congratulate him on a wonderful day.

It was a pleasure and an inspiration to serve with fellow missionaries who were earnestly striving to give up the lives they had built to go and do God’s will.  

Now I don’t want to give you the impression that my last year-and-a-half has been one continuous string of great days.  Rather it has been a lot of work, with plenty of challenges and disappointments.  But what I can say is that my love for my Father-in-Heaven and my Savior has increased, that I trust that God can make more of my life than I can, and that I now want to let Him. 

I feel very fortunate to have had this opportunity to serve again as a full-time missionary and build or strengthen these relationships with the couples I served with, my wife and my God.  I hope that someday my posterity will follow our example in serving the Lord as full-time missionaries and find joy in doing so.