A DIFFERENT KIND OF CHRISTMAS

It seemed kind of strange this week to celebrate Christmas without being around family, without Christmas decorations in our home, or any special events to attend.  On our last two missions we had many wonderful get togethers during the Christmas season. While serving in the Church Office Building there was an abundance of beautiful lights and music on Temple Square, along with occasional Christmas parties with General Authorities.  While serving in Germany there were many Christmas outings to attend with the other Area Office missionaries, including several visits to the beautiful German Christmas markets. One of our daughters came with her family to visit over Christmas. It all seemed rather special.

While the Filipinos love Christmas, it seems like life goes on as normal here on Christmas Day.  The malls and stores are open. Traffic was a little lighter than usual. The temperature that day reached the low 90’s here - very different than the snow which was coming down in Utah.  The pool at our apartment building was crowded with families enjoying the sun.  It really didn’t seem much different than any other day of the year. 

I (Eileen), have spent many hours on the phone this week with missionaries suffering from various physical ailments. In talking with them further it seems like many of their symptoms are related to stress. While celebrating Christmas should be very joyful, for some it can bring many emotions to the surface, some of which are manifest in physical symptoms.

In the midst of my trying to sort out these thoughts, our daughter Heather sent this quote to us by Elder Vaughn J. Featherstone.

“Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year’s will never be the same again once you have celebrated them while serving a mission. Imagine a small Christmas tree with a few decorations, Christmas carols, a humble apartment, never more in love with your wife—a Christmas spirit that makes that little apartment seem as a sacred temple. You pack your white baptismal clothing and walk, hand in hand, to the chapel, where a little family waits patiently to enter God’s kingdom through the waters of baptism. You see the star of wonder, not hanging over Bethlehem, but in the eyes of the humble, sweet converts. You look at your wife, she looks at you; nothing need or can be said, both of you overcome with joy.  The twelve or eighteen months will seem as a small moment, but the memories will last through the eternities.”

This quote was very touching to me, and made me think beyond the “normal” events of Christmas to the joy we have felt the last few months in observing the conversion process of our newly found friends, Lance and Grace.  We invited Lance, Grace and their family along with Sister Gibson over for dinner on Christmas Eve. We had barely sat down at our tiny table when Lance announced he had decided to get baptized on January 11^th. I was overjoyed. He then said he was looking forward to going to the temple. When Shannon, the 13 year old daughter asked her mother what going to the temple meant, Grace told Shannon, “It means you will be my daughter forever!”  At that moment I couldn’t think of a better way to celebrate the birth of our Savior than to have a small part in bringing souls to Him. I could more fully understand the scripture from Doctrine and Covenants 18:15-16. “And if it so be that you should labor all your days in crying repentance unto this people, and bring, save it be one soul unto me how great shall be your joy with him in the kingdom of my Father.”

In all of our years in trying to share the gospel with others we have never had an experience like we have had with this family. It has seemed like what you would read in an Ensign article.  Things like this don’t happen to us, yet it has. We have thoroughly enjoyed it.

Christmas Day we went to the Alders home for supper. With pooled funds from the other seniors, Russell and I went shopping a week ago and bought the food for Christmas dinner.  We were concerned that if we waited until the last minute they might run out of turkeys. Our 12 pound turkey was 45 dollars, yet is sure tasted good!  Potatoes were 50 cents each for small potatoes. The Bills made wonderful mashed potatoes. I guess if you are from Idaho you know how to do that. Sister Gibson made stuffing/dressing from scratch, and the Gordons brought a huge fruit platter. Things were starting to feel more like Christmas. 

Before we started eating, President Alder read us a letter he received from a young sister missionary that put us all in tears.  This sister and her companion visited a small family consisting of a widow and four small children on what was Thanksgiving Day in the U.S.  There was one twin mattress for five people in the small one-room home, and no food to be had. The sisters excused themselves, ran home, got what had planned on being their own lunch and brought it back to this family. As there were not enough utensils or plates for the family to eat off of, they each used their hands to partake of this simple meal. This sister missionary said that it was the sweetest Thanksgiving dinner she has ever participated in, and one that she would remember for years to come.

Life here in the Philippines is simple and the people are very humble, working long hours to provide for their needs. We have been told that the average pay for unskilled laborers is equivalent to eight to ten US dollars per day. It is difficult to provide, yet the people here are friendly and kind. Last week an older sister proudly announced to me that she was a new member!  I was a little confused. It turned out her baptism was today. We attended the baptism of her and her son this morning. The bishop told us there had been about 50 people baptized in just our individual Taytay ward in the last year. He spoke today in church requesting the faith of the members not only in coming to church but paying their tithes and fast offerings. His hope is that this ward will be divided by the end of next year. He extended an invitation to all of us to minister to our friends and neighbors so that every bench in the chapel can be full each Sunday.  

During the second hour of church today there was a presentation on the self-reliance program. In two weeks they will start a class on building your own business after church. Grace quickly found the self-reliance booklets in the Gospel Library app and was explaining the class to another sister who rarely comes to church. I watched in wonder at seeing Grace who was only baptized two weeks ago share what she was learning with others around her. 

My phone has been binging constantly this afternoon with messages regarding both housing and medical. It is good to be needed.  We are where we are supposed to be this Christmas season. It is a blessing to be able to serve here in the Philippines. Even as I post this fireworks are going off outside our window. Hopefully nothing catches on fire!

Lance, Grace, Sister Gibson and Shannon as we read the Christmas story

Bree and Russell with some small gifts we purchased for her.

Christmas night at the Alders

President Alder cutting the turkey. We don't have an oven so turkey was a really special treat.

Sister Alder reading a Christmas book to us. It is a tradition in their family to get a new Christmas book every year and read it on Christmas.

Elder and Sister Gordon are 78 and 81 years old. They are serving as MLS missionaries in the province and keep a really positive attitude.

Russell returning from a housing inspection in Teresa. One of the recently released missionaries left his emergency backpack. We will fill it up and give it to someone else.

Delivering items to another missionary apartment in Morong. The flowers lining this pathway are really beautiful.

Big loads of just about anything can be piled on a jeepney.

Some kind of special soup served at the small Christmas fair in Antipolo. The lady wanted to give me a free taste but I declined.

The bbq at the fair smelled delicious, but I wouldn't dare eat it for fear of getting sick.

Christmas tree at the main government building in Antipolo.

I

HIGHS AND LOWS

Every six weeks a group of young missionaries goes home and a new group arrives.  Since the six week schedule would have transfers occurring on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, it was moved up a week.  On Tuesday morning those going home attended a temple session followed by a few workshops in the afternoon and then a testimony meeting after dinner.  Eileen and I conducted one of the workshops.  Basically, we addressed the life changes that the missionaries would experience upon returning home: the lack of focused purpose and daily structure; their individual responsibility for financial support and career preparation; and then choosing friends and an eternal companion.  We asked the missionaries to first write down what lessons they had learned and what good habits they had made on their mission.  We then had them apply these lessons and habits to the new set of challenges that were about to confront them.  The discussions we had were both entertaining and insightful.  All was going as planned until Elder Kaufusi asked Eileen, why/how did you decide to marry Elder Healy?  Listening to Eileen’s answer reminded me how fortunate I am to have her as my eternal companion and risks she took entrusting her future to someone as young and unprepared as I was.  

On Thursday, President and Sister Alder treated the senior missionaries to a fabulous lunch buffet in Manila, after which we visited one of the Church sponsored Giving Machines in a local mall.  I believe there are several in the U.S. with only two outside, one in London and the other in Manila.  The machines are vending machines where users can buy (donate) various humanitarian related project items: a child’s eye screening or hearing test, an amputees artificial limb, a child’s school backpack, etc.   The items ranged in price between 50 and 1,000 pesos (approximately 1 to 20 USD).

This past week we have had a few things take place that are difficult to comprehend the logic behind them.  A needless redesigned office parking lot, a sister missionary's expression of displeasure, a missionary apartment’s faulty water storage system, etc.  They all involve good people endeavoring to deal with difficult situations but perhaps falling a bit short.  I have been reading, SAINTS, THE STANDARD OF TRUTH - Volume 1.  Unlike many prior Church history books, it tries to portray the early saints as accurately as possible, noting their challenges and frailties.  I found myself seeing similarities between the interpersonal challenges they had and those that still confront us here in Antipolo.  It seems that, almost always, we and other are trying to do our best but falling short due to our “natural man” tendencies.  Our Lord’s direction in Matt. 7:1-3, that I should focus on my own faults and judge less is something I need to work more at doing.

Our APs, Elder Chandler on the left is being assigned elsewhere and Elder Ivins in the middle is our new AP.  We love working with them.

President Alder taking a quick snack between interviews of departing missionaries. 

Elder Bills doing a final tally of money with Sister Scanlan before she departs for the US.

Just doing his job - this welder works right outside our window.

We had a wonderful parking lot at the office until someone had the idea to rip it down and  allow us only 4 parking spots for the mission while we have 6 vehicles that will be parking there. It makes it really difficult to get in and out of the lot and truly makes no sense to us at all.

I was surprised to see this at a local restaurant. One of my granddaughters has painted an almost identical picture

Sister Lor's family came to the mission home to pick her up. It was a joyful reunion.

Sister Gibson saying good-bye to Elder Kaufusi.  He is anticipating playing football next year at the U of U.

This is the huge line of people waiting to enter the mall which doesn't open until 11 a.m.  I would think the week before Christmas it would open sooner.

The buffet the Alders took us to was like nothing we have seen in the last 6 months. 

There are only 2 Giving Machines outside of the U.S.  One is in Manila and the other is in London.

There were many different items you could purchase for those in need. Some were as cheap as 2 U.S. dollars.

We did an inspection of this group of Elder's apartment. They were pleasant about the fact that they hadn't had access to any water for 48 hours. Needless to say Russell got on that right away and they now have water.

WHITE CHRISTMAS

Very early last Monday morning we left Jessica’s family and began our journey back to the Philippines.  Arriving late Tuesday evening we found the airport busier than during our prior two recent arrivals.  Many Filipinos work overseas, coming home just once a year, and Christmas is their favorite time to do so.  Wednesday Eileen was swamped with nursing work and on Thursday I (Russell) spent the day with a missionary suffering with a kidney stone in the hospital ER.  On Friday we were back on the road doing housing inspections. On Saturday, we were able to participate in Grace’s baptism and see her confirmed on Sunday.  Lance and their two girls were there with us both days.  It has been week of extremes: locations; types of work; concerns over loved ones (family, friends and missionaries); joy over seeing their achievements; and witnessing God’s hand in the details of our lives.  I am very grateful for this week.

We were thrilled to learn that Grace was going to be baptized and that we would be home to witness it.  Although the vast majority of our time here is spent dealing with the health and housing issues of the young missionaries, it has been the moments when we are sharing the gospel and teaching it’s principles that have been the most rewarding.  With Grace’s baptism scheduled to start at 5 PM, I thought we should spend a few minutes beforehand discussing exactly how the ordinance would be performed.  I wanted the experience to be a wonderful one for Grace and her family and to avoid needing to repeat the baptism because we failed to do it correctly.  

With this in mind, Grace came to our apartment at 1 PM for what I thought would be a short visit.  During the next 2.5 hours we learned about the challenges Grace had been facing earlier in her week.  On Monday, a longtime friend of her husband was killed during a robbery by several young men.  On Wednesday, another friend of the family committed suicide.  Then on Saturday morning Grace learned that a very close relative had a serious medical issue.  It seemed like everything that could go wrong did so in the week leading up to her baptism.  We listened and gave our condolences but I’m sure nothing we said was as important as just being with her to “mourn with those that mourn; . . . comfort those that stand in need of comfort, and to stand as witness of God.”  After her baptism, Grace said that as she came up out of the water that it felt like she had left some of the weight of her challenges behind.  Today as I watched her in church with her family beside her, I couldn’t help but notice the contrast in her from the prior afternoon. The problems Grace was facing had not changed but she had changed.  The Holy Ghost is sometimes referred to as “the Comforter.”  Yesterday and today I have witnessed the Comforter at work.

Our Christmas zone conference with 3 zones. Russell graciously offered to stay at the hospital all day with a missionary so that the rest of us could attend.

Sister Rose catered the luncheon. We had two turkeys and a full pig.

Sister and President Alder performing the  Night Before Christmas.  President was doing the hand movements while Sister Alder was talking.

The office missionaries had a birthday celebration for Eileen.

At Grace's baptism the water only came thigh high as she is very tall. The sister missionaries plugged up the drain to get the water level higher. What we didn't know was that they left the water on during the baptismal talks. The water overflowed all over the bathroom and part of the hallway. The good news was that it only took one try for Grace to be fully immersed during baptism.

Grace with Eileen and Russell. President Alder encouraged every companionship to have a "White Christmas" with a baptism during the month of December. We were thrilled to be able to attend Grace's baptism.

Grace, her family and Sister Lulab and Sister Tampis

Eloisa was baptized on Sunday. She works at the bakery a block from the office. We frequently buy baked goods there.  She is always very happy and smiling, although today she was nervous for her baptism. Eloisa told her boss that if she couldn't have Sundays off to go to church she would quit. The boss likes her so much that she gave her Sundays off so that she could keep her as an employee.

This photo was taken from the window of our apartment. The strange thing is that there has been no rain at all today. 

LOOKING BACK

As I (Eileen) contemplate the recent time spent with Jessica and her family my thoughts turned to two personal experiences from many years ago.  The first was when I found out that I needed a spinal fusion which was done just 3 weeks before our scheduled marriage. I decided to have the operation because I was told that I would probably never bear any children with my back in the condition it was. We had all our marriage invitations printed, food prepared for the receptions, and thought we had a pretty good plan for our future. I was only one semester away from graduating from nursing school and my intent was to graduate and then work to put Russell through graduate school.  The surgery definitely put a kink in our plans. I moved from Utah back to Colorado and had surgery in my hometown.  I was in the hospital for 7 weeks, unable to walk, bend or roll side to side. I avoided bed sores by lying flat on the circle bed and every few hours flipping to my stomach by having the bed rotate circularly until I reached a prone position. It was a long and painful recovery.  My sweet mother came every day to visit me, and even spent a few nights at the hospital when I was having a particularly hard time. When I returned home, my mother tended to my every need (which were many), never complaining or showing any reluctance. She was very busy as my father had been transferred and the family was preparing for an interstate move. Our wedding was postponed 4 months, and when I returned to nursing school, I was told that it was critical that I not bend, lift, or jar my back in any way until 6 months after the surgery.  My good parents, especially my mother diligently ministered to my every need, supporting me in every way during this difficult time. 

Fast forward 5 years. I was pregnant with my third daughter when I was diagnosed with a massive blood clot. I was advised that an abortion might be the best alternative as my life was in danger if the blood clot moved to my heart or lungs. It was just a few weeks before Christmas when I was hospitalized. I had two small children at home, presents to wrap, food to cook to give as neighborhood gifts, a house to decorate, and I was the organist for our church Christmas concert.  It didn’t take me more than a day or two in the hospital to realize all those things were of minor significance compared to the challenges I would be facing in making it through the pregnancy.  I was able to return home just a few days before Christmas and was so grateful for the blessing of being alive and the opportunity of spending the holiday with my family.  When tax season approached and Russell was working long hours, I realized there was no possible way I could take care of the children on my own. My parents invited me to Arizona to spend as much time as I needed with them while Russell was in his busy season.  I spent 6 weeks in Arizona with my parents. Again, my mother readily cared for my children and my needs, making sure we had nutritious meals, enjoyed the sunshine by taking my children to the park, doing the laundry and basically giving me the ability to rest. 

My parents both passed away a few months ago. Although I miss them, I have no doubt that they are in a happier state. My mother suffered from Alzheimer’s the last few years of her life. She became somebody so different from the vibrant, cheerful, active mother that raised me.  As we have helped Jessica during this difficult time of her surgery and recovery, she has frequently expressed gratitude for our help. It was a reminder to me of all the efforts my mother put in over the years to assist me and my family. She was a wonderful example of the selfless love that God would like all of us to render to our fellow beings. 

The kids wanted to cuddle with their mother to watch a video. I was there for crowd control and to protect her from getting jumped on.

I (Eileen) went with Jessica’s husband and daughter to a crèche exhibit. It was in one of our church buildings. There were crèches donated from citizens throughout the community. There were over 1,100 different crèche displays. It was a wonderful way to spend some time getting into the Christmas spirit. 

The children really wanted to cook marshmallows over the fire pit. The weather finally cleared enough that we could do it. 

We had the wonderful opportunity to go to Bailey's piano Christmas recital.

GIVING THANKS

As Thanksgiving is not a holiday in the Philippines, I (Russell) had not thought that we would be celebrating it and especially not in the U.S. with family members.  However, as I look back on the events of the past week it seems fitting that I recognize the many, many blessings that I have in my life and give credit and thanks to God for them.  I have been blessed to: be born to wonderful parents who with my grandparents taught me the Gospel of Jesus Christ; grow up in the U.S. and in this day and age with its opportunities for education and work that have eluded most of the world’s inhabitants; have my beloved wife and children (and their spouses) and 15 grandchildren; and have the health and financial means to be able to serve as a full-time missionary representing my Savior Jesus Christ and His restored church on the earth.  I am indeed blessed.

Earlier this week our daughter was operated on and just today was released from the hospital.  While full recovery is still a long way off, we are grateful for how well things have gone with her surgery.  The hospital and medical professionals were amazing.  Eileen spent many hours, including staying overnight in the hospital, with Jessica.  Being a nurse herself, Eileen can be a fairly critical of other medical professionals, their facilities and the care they give.  So when Eileen told Sister Alder that the hospital Jessica was in was like being in the Celestial Kingdom of hospitals, I knew she was impressed.

Since Jessica’s husband was helping her get released from the hospital this morning, Eileen and I had the kids to ourselves in church today.  It has been a while since I have done that. As I was attempting to work with the two boys during sacrament meeting, I noticed another father near me trying to keep his son from being disruptive.  Since the family was multi-racial (like my own) it reminded me that my son Vijay was blessing his fourth child in church in Utah.  I miss not being able to be with family on such important occasions.  After church we learned that our investigators in the Philippines were unable to attend church today because the husband was sick and in the hospital.  I find myself wishing that I could be in all three places.  I am grateful to be wanted and needed.

Jessica and children two days before surgery 

It was a challenge walking again. We so very much appreciated all the staff who worked their holiday to help our daughter. I (Eileen) have worked many holidays, sometimes willingly, sometimes not as much. I made sure I told each staff member that came into Jessica’s room how much I appreciated them spending their holiday weekend away from their family.

In the lobby of the hospital a pianist playing beautiful Christmas carols

The hospital lobby. I sent Sister Alder a photo. She replied, are you sure you aren’t on vacation at some mountain resort?  The hotel was lovely as were all the staff. 

The children at the hospital. 

Making poppy seed bread for those who helped the family.